A Fire Within
by shortstack7
Summary: If Bella met Jacob first, and under different circumstances when she arrived in Forks, would anything change? Will a head start give Jacob a fighting chance? Can the external heat quench the fire within?
1. Chapter 1

**So here we go. 5 months of reading and I've finally decided to try writing. I don't know how far this will go, or how regularly I'll write, but I had to put something on paper! Please enjoy:)  
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Not even 2 hours after stepping off the plane, Charlie and I were on the road to La Push. Not that I should be surprised. Dad spent the majority of his free time on the reservation with Billy these days. Without even a chance to freshen up, he'd insisted we go visit, which did nothing to calm my nerves after the morning's emotional good-byes and long flight to Forks.

The cold December air blew my hair, tossing it around my now rosy cheeks as I stepped from the cruiser and we made our way up the short path to the Black's home. Though years had passed since my last visit, the tiny house's familiarity was not lost on me. I heard the soft creaking of the door's hinges as it carelessly swung open.

"Bella? Is that you? Oh my… you've certainly grown up without us!" Billy's jovial voice rang from the doorway. He expertly maneuvered his wheelchair on to the front patio before another figure came barreling through the entry.

"Bella's here!" a much younger, yet unexpectedly deep voice called. I looked up to see a lanky, long-haired figure quickly moving to greet me. His long, dark locks framed the brilliant white smile that seemed permanently etched in the center of his face.

"Wow, if I'd known you guys would be so excited to see Bells, I'd have brought her sooner!" Charlie replied with a chuckle as I felt a wave of blush creep up my cheekbone.

"Ch-Dad, cut it out, we literally dropped my bags and got back in the cruiser. Not to mention I wasn't planning on moving until right before classes started, and now I'm here before Christmas," I qualified.

"So you're here for a few weeks before school starts ehh?" The boy replied, his smile still glittering under the lamp light from the porch.

"Bella, you remember Jacob, I hope?" I glanced at Jacob, trying to find the features of the small child I'd last seen. His warm eyes were the same, but aside from the obvious characteristics of his Quileute heritage, nothing else was. His lanky arms were wrapped carelessly around each other, only complimented by the uneven distribution of weight on his legs, jutting one bony hip out to the side as he leaned against the railing on the porch. For as young as he had to be, almost two full years my junior, his tall frame contradicted the boyish charm of his face. His body may have developed past that of a 15 year old boy, but nothing about him from the neck up would lead you to believe otherwise.

"Vaguely, Billy. It's been quite some time since I've been around here and I think last time I saw him, he may have been wearing diapers." Jacob's easy manner and smile immediately calmed my nerves, and we exchanged a quick hug.

"Bella, if you're already moved in at home then you should come spend some of your break with me! I mean us! And you too, Charlie!" I felt the familiar heat of blush rise again on my cheeks at Jacob's eager invitation.

"Well, Charlie? I was going to extend the invitation for Christmas to you anyway, but it seems my excitable son has beat me to the punch." Billy's eye flitted between Charlie and I, seeking some kind of confirmation that his invitation had been accepted.

"It might be nice to spend Christmas with the whole family this year, wouldn't it Bells? I mean, you and Jake can get reacquainted. And there's a game on, so we can watch that before we eat!" The skin around Charlie's eyes crinkled as his lips stretched into a wide grin at the prospect of a Christmas spent on the couch with his friends—and daughter—and a home cooked meal.

"Sure, Dad but-"

I didn't get to finish my thought, as Charlie suddenly remembered why we came out to La Push today anyway. "Wait! I almost forgot! Bells, now I know you wanted to save up for a car and everything, but I found a much better solution. "

I tried to stifle the groan I knew would inevitably follow. "Dad, please don't spend any money on me! I told you I've saved up and I really don't want to burden you."

"Lucky for you then, Bella, he didn't spend a dime," Billy remarked with a wink. "Jake, take her to the back to see the truck and make sure it's ready to drive out of here. Charlie, you want a soda or something? Come on in for a minute while the kids get this settled."

Jake grinned, grabbed my hand, and took off towards the back, dragging me along. "C'mon, Bella, I'm so glad you're taking this thing off my hands!"

Thing. That can't be good. As we rounded the corner to the back yard, my foot caught on some stray peice of the woods surrounding the Black's house. I tried to catch my balance, but over corrected, inevitably stumbling further forward. Instinctively, my hand detached from Jacob's to catch the fall, but I was too late.

Thud.

"Oooof, ow. Knew it was coming."

Jacob's laughter echoed off the trees. "You okay there klutz?" A warm hand found mine, another wrapped around my waist to help me up. I reveled in the immediate relief from the cold night air.

"Yeah, it happens. Often." The routine mental check for injuries returned negative results, minus a few scratches on the heels of my hands. "Looks okay though!"

"So does this mean I should get the doctor on speed dial or something? Or will a first aid kit be enough?" he teased through a goofy smile. I couldn't help but smile back. Something about the warmth of his expression, his hands, it all made this cold, cloudy town a little brighter.

"Alright, enough joking at my expense. Where is this thing? Wait, what is it really, and why did you call it a thing?"

Jake just laughed and pulled me around the side of the garage. There it was. An old, red truck.

"Isn't she great? She runs like a dream. Fixed everything myself, you know? It was Billy's, but since he can't exactly drive it anymore, and I'm not quite old enough yet. But really, I'm glad you're taking it because I can work on building my car. And hey, at least you can spend all that hard-earned money you've been saving on something else."

"Wait, Jacob, you fixed this yourself? You are going to _build_ a car? How… I mean WOW." It didn't escape my notice that he seemed pleased with my reaction. I guess, if it is does us both a favor, maybe I don't feel so bad about taking it. "So it sounds like I'm taking this off your hands tonight then? How long till your car is done?"

He retreated to the inside of the garage. Suddenly a dim glow fell upon what appeared to be the shell of a very old car. He opened one door and motioned for me to take a seat. "Yeah, car's yours tonight. Again, I'm glad for you to take it. Now that I don't have to worry about fixing that up anymore, I can focus on this. It's a Rabbit," he declared with a proud grin as I sat in the driver's seat and and admired the half-built car

"I still need a ton more parts, but I'm not really in a hurry yet. I can walk most anywhere I need to go around here, or hitch a ride. Though that does complicate coming to Forks whenever, " he mused, probably more to himself than me. "Anyways, it's just kind of something I've always done. I've been working on this for a while now, on and off. If that truck is any proof, this baby will run like a dream when I'm done!" Jake smiled again, full of warmth. It seemed to radiate from him, filling the tiny garage with heat in the cold, December night. I smiled, thinking how fortunate I was to have a friend I could talk to so easily on my first night in town.

"So, uh, how old exactly is the truck?" I questioned. It wasn't that I didn't trust his handiwork, but the truck looked pretty ancient. The round curve of the hood reminiscent of a previous era was only outdone by the faded red paint, clearly dull from overuse and lack of care at one time. Part of me wondered how long Billy had owned that truck, or if Billy's dad before him was the original owner.

"Eh, not sure really. Runs great though. But I wouldn't try to drive it much past fifty. Thing's tough, but it isn't made for speed. Although, if you're as clumsy as you say, it's probably better that way." Another goofy grin made its way across his tanned face. It was impossible to resist the urge to smile back and swat his arm.

"I thought we were done making fun of Bella? Though I'm glad to hear it's sturdy, because as much as I hate to admit it, you are probably right. If it rains as much here as I remember, I'd rather have a truck that can handle a little tussle with the elements. Probably increases my chance of surviving this place." An unintentional sigh escaped, and I remembered the weather-related consequences of my decision. No more arid, desert heat. No more sun, except on the occasional good day. I hoped Renee was well in muggy Florida. Surely that would be a transition for her just as this was for me.

"Bells, Jake? You kids got everything figured out yet? We need to head home, Bells," Charlie voice carried from the other side of the house.

"Sure, sure, Charlie. I'm just giving her the keys and going over a few things. We'll drive it around," Jake replied, reaching towards a shelf on the wall and plopping a set of silver keys in my hand. "So here you go! I guess it's time to go." His demeanor shifted, now almost childlike, to a sad pout. "You will come and see me again, right?"

Smiling, I answered. "I think I'd like that Jake. Thanks again, for everything. Can I call you if Red over there gives me any problems?"

The sparkle returned to his eye, and another gleaming smile appeared. "Sure, sure! I am at your disposal. Your personal mechanic." He offered me a hand and helped me out of the car. We walked casually over to the truck and I opened the door.

"I guess I'll see you soon then. Bye Jake!" After exchanging a quick hug, I turned the key in the ignition and jumped in surprise as the engine underneath the worn hood roared to life. I could barely hear Jake's chortle outside at my reaction to the unexpected volume.

As Charlie lead the way out of the drive and towards Forks, I realized I was still smiling. Though we had been too young to know each other then, talking with Jake was so effortless, as if we'd been friends our whole lives. I was struck by how warm and inviting he was to someone he barely knew, and immediately felt some of my despair melt away. Maybe moving to this stupid, cloudy town would be okay after all.


	2. Chapter 2

I spent the next morning lazily unpacking my few possessions, settling them in to their familiar places in my old room. Despite the lacking urgency, it didn't take long. Another cloudy day in Forks and not much better to do. The chilled air sneaking in through the slightly cracked window reminded me of Billy and Jake's offer for Christmas. I hadn't thought to do any shopping in Phoenix, knowing it would just add to the difficulty of moving. Not to mention the decision to bump the move date happened pretty suddenly. Renee and Phil weren't supposed to leave for Florida until after New Years, but an injury in the team's original line-up meant they needed him sooner. Though she'd never admit it, I knew she wouldn't want to spend Christmas without him, so the inevitable move to Forks just got bumped up a few weeks. I didn't even think to say goodbye to the sun.

A little after noon I decided to wander downstairs and investigate the grocery situation. It didn't take long to realize how dire it was. I made a list and decided there was no time like the present to go explore Forks, even if that just meant picking up groceries and maybe looking for some Christmas gifts. As I finished bundling myself for the cold and made for the truck, the jarring of the telephone stopped my momentum. I stumbled for the phone as quickly as I could, only bumping into the coffee table and couch on my way.

"Hello?"

"Bella? Hi!"

"Hey Jake, what's up?" I smiled to myself at his enthusiasm, still contagious over the phone.

"I just wanted to check in and see if you were settled? And make sure that truck didn't give you any trouble on the way home. I didn't realize how big it was until you sat in the driver's seat!"

"Like you said, Jake, it runs great! I unpacked my stuff this morning, and I'm actually headed to get some groceries for Charlie right now. Well, and explore a little. Not that I expect a lot of change, but it's been a while since my last stay, and I can't quite remember where everything is."

"Sounds like you've got your day planned out. Well, any chance we can hang out soon? I know you and your dad are coming for Christmas, but that's still a few days off. Maybe you could come over tomorrow?"

"I'll have to double check with Charlie, but I'm sure that's okay. Can I call you later tonight when he gets home?"

"Sure, sure. See you soon, Bells!"

A smile snuck onto my face, and a ghost of the warmth I'd felt last night returned as I made my way to the truck.

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Unable to sleep, I awoke early the next morning to a rare sunny morning, the weather reflecting my internal state.

I quickly washed my face and brushed my teeth and hair, deciding not to let the unruly tendrils bring my mood down. A quick glance at the clock confirmed it was probably too early to call Jake and let him know I was on my way to La Push. Realizing I had some time, I sat down at my desk and switched on the ancient computer taking up most of the flat surface. I hadn't thought to let Renee know I was okay, not that she didn't have enough to distract her as well. Sometimes I wondered if she would ever be able to keep everything together without someone like me or Phil. Or Charlie. After the agonizing boot process finished, my email inbox indicated that Renee had done the opposite of forget. Six messages blinked back at me, each one with a more urgent subject line than the one before it.

I glanced over each one and wrote a quick reply, letting her know I was settled in but wouldn't check my email every fifteen minutes, and that so far everything was going okay. She seemed to be settling in well in Florida, so I was sure she wouldn't mind if I just checked in. After all, not much had really changed in the two days since I left. Well, except for Jake, the truck, exploring Forks. That could wait for the next email.

Finally, it seemed a decent enough hour to call over to the Black's. Jake answered on the first ring, which didn't fail to make my heart beat just a little bit faster.

"Hello?"

"Hey Jake, it s Bella. Is it too early to come over?"

"Not at all! I'm glad you called. Hurry up, okay?" His eagerness was comforting. I hadn't really had good friends in Phoenix. Jake's energy and vibrant spirit was new in so many ways to me. Definitely the sun breaking through the clouds.

In no time I'd made the drive, pushing the truck as fast as it could go down the wooded highway. At hearing the unmistakable growling of the truck's engine, Jake emerged from the back of the house with two other boys before I'd even put the truck in park. He nearly pulled me out of the cab and into a tight hug before I had time to catch a breath.

"Bella! I'm glad you could come today! We're going down to First Beach later so you can meet everyone." At the mention of "everyone" the two other boys jumped forward.

"Hi, I'm Quil, this is Embry, Jake's much better looking friends," Quil said with a grin and a wiggle of his dark eyebrows. He threw out a hand in greeting, Embry quickly following suit.

"So how's Forks so far? Tired of the clouds yet? You know, you're lucky you get to experience a sunny day here at all, let alone in December on your first week in town," Embry began. "I'm sure Jake's spent so much time talking about himself that he forgot to even mention us. Nice to see how the guy treats his best friends, eh?"

Laughing, I quipped back "Well he's been just fine to me! In fact, far better than I expected or deserved after so much time apart. We were childhood friends when I used to visit Chief Swan during summers. And Forks is okay, but La Push is probably better, so far." At that Jacob's face lit up, causing Quil to snicker quietly and Jake to send him a quick jab to the ribs.

"And I'm so glad to see the sun again. It's only been a couple of days since I left Phoenix, but it's amazing how much difference a little light can make." I glanced over to Jake, blushing a little at his still radiant smile and the double meaning of my words. "I guess that does make me pretty lucky, Embry."

"How about we go inside for a bit to stay warm? And get some food, I'm kinda hungry," Quil suggested.

"I'm down. Hey Bella, you want some lunch or did you already eat? We'll take some down to the beach later, if it's warm enough, but we might as well get some now."

"Sure, Jake." With that, the four of us trudged inside and settled in for the afternoon. Despite the three large boys and tiny Bella in the room, it seemed something was missing. Quil caught it first and asked, "So where's your Dad today, Jake? Not like him to be gone in the middle of the day."

He replied, "I think he went to hang out at the Clearwater's before the council meeting. He seemed kinda serious when he left this morning, but I figured he just didn't get enough sleep. With all the excitement of Bella 's arrival, who could, right?" He flashed me a silly grin and my cheeks flushed again and a small smile crept onto my lips. I wasn't used to all of this attention, and normally I'd hate it. Something about this was different, though. Jake's eager interest was like a welcomed assault on me, drawing me towards him with every smile. Something about him seemed older than just fifteen, and for a moment I wondered if the age difference could really matter.

I helped Jake throw together some cold cut sandwiches and the four of us happily plopped down on the couch in front of the television to spend the afternoon. When everyone was done, I instinctively cleared the plates into the kitchen, then returned to my dent in the couch. As I sat, Jake threw a warm arm around my shoulders and I snuggled in, realizing the chill in the air when I'd left the couch. He smelled like the woods and musk, a warm, deep, natural smell, relaxing and pleasant.

The four of us watched TV and joked around for a few more hours until Jake got a phone call announcing it was time to go to the beach. We piled in to the cab of the truck and made the quick trip down to First Beach where a roaring bonfire and several of Jake's friends were waiting.

As we made the walk down the beach, Jake tugged on my sleeve, silently telling me to hold back from the others. "I just wanted to give you a quick warning before you meet everyone. Emily, Sam's girlfriend, got stuck in a bad situation with a bear a while back. It got her pretty bad, but don't stare, okay? She doesn't mind it, but it makes Sam really upset. And he can be kind of scary when he's upset. But don't worry, he's a great guy! Just protective."

"No worries, Jake. I'm glad I'm getting to meet all of your friends. You know, this is already more people than I ever really knew in Phoenix." As much as I didn't want to think about it, I truly was already friends with more people—and better friends—than I had been in Phoenix. I guess when you have Renee, that's more than enough to keep you busy.

"Aw, any time Bells. Now let's get down there before they eat all the food. I'm starving!" With another tug at my sleeve, Jake swiftly took my hand in his warm one and we sped off to catch up with Embry and Quil. It pleased me that holding hands with a boy was so easy when that boy was Jake. His fingers left a warm, tingly sensation on my knuckles and I smiled at the reassuring squeeze he gave me as we approached the group.

"Hey guys, this is Bella, Chief Swan's daughter. Bella, this is everyone." I laughed at his detailed introduction, and quickly settled next to Jake on a log near the fire. The conversation in the group flowed easily, with quick banter back and forth between the boys until the food was ready.

During the upheaval caused by several overgrown teenage boys racing at the same instant for hot dogs and sticks, the woman who could only be Emily walked over and took a seat next to me and introduced herself. She was quiet, but not reserved, and beautiful. Even with the scarring on one side of her face from her eye to her lips, it was very obvious just how good looking she had been and still was.

"I know it can be hard sometimes running around with all of these boys, so if you ever need a girl to talk to, don't hesitate okay? Though Sam looks like he's in his late twenties, we're both only a couple of years older than you, so I understand things better than you might think," she added with a wink and a devious grin. "I couldn't help but notice the reaction our Jake seems to have in your presence. He's always happy, but with you the glimmer in his eye seems a little stronger. You two were old friends, right?"

Altogether unsure how to interpret her observation, I stuck with the basics. "Charlie and Billy are really good friends. As a result, Jake and I knew each other way back in the day. We've become reacquainted in the whole three days I've been in town. He's pretty easy to get along with," I finished, trying to keep the discussion as neutral as possible.

At that instant, Jake returned and ungracefully plopped down on the other side of me with two hot dogs, some chips, and a couple of drinks. "Thought I'd save you the trouble of having to cook the first one, but if you want more, next round is on you!" I laughed and took the hot dog and soda, trying to balance both without spilling anything.

The afternoon turned into evening, and as the temperature started to drop with the sun, I shouldered my way under Jake's arm to stay warm. He offered me his coat, which I nearly turned down until he claimed, "Bells, seriously, take it. I've been sweating all day anyway, and I still have a sweatshirt on without it. You need it more than me. Don't worry," he added with a cheeky grin, "I'll still let you huddle under my arm, if that's what you're really worried about losing!"

"If you insist, and you promise I won't lose the arm heat, then okay." I slipped my arms through the sleeves of his jacket, and suddenly realized he wasn't joking. "Jeez, Jake! You really are pretty warm. You aren't getting sick or something, are you?"

I noticed Sam, the biggest of the Quileute boys, turn suddenly to look at Jake out of the corner of his eye. From his seat near Emily, he looked almost frightening with the shadows of the fire dancing against his dark skin and serious eyes. He roamed once over Jake, eyebrows drawn together in concentration as if he didn't find what he expected to see. I looked away, not wanting him to acknowledge my observation.

"Nah, it's just my thick skin. I'm just a champ when it comes to the cold, Bells. But if I was sick, would you come take care of me?" he asked with silly puppy eyes and a childish pout to match.

"You wish, Jake. She totally likes me better, right, Bella?" Quil yelled across the fire, earning hearty laughs from everyone except Jake who continued to pout. The banter continued back and forth, and as I sat and watched my new friends joke and laugh, I smiled to myself at how things were working out so far. At this rate, even if I hated school in Forks when I started in a couple of weeks, I knew I'd have some place to go where I could forget all about it.

As we packed up to leave several hot dogs later, Jake took my hand again and led the way to my truck. "So you never really answered the question, Bells," he began as he opened the cab door and pulled me in for a rough hug.

Remembering I still wore his coat, I glanced up at him and asked, "Which question do you mean?" As my other arm freed itself from the coat, his eyes met mine, filled with a mischievous sparkle and something different… "Who _do_ you like better, Bells?" His warm hands slowly worked up and down my arms, almost as if trying to warm them in the cool night air. Yet where his arms passed, the warm tingle I'd felt on my knuckles before was followed by a slight chill.

"Jake do you really have to ask? I've known you longest, I know you best. Of course it's you," I replied with as much innocence as possible. In truth he was starting to grow on me a in a very different way. The affection and concern for me, his eagerness and attention, the warmth in his smile and on his hands… it drew me to him.

The giddy smile returned. "Yes! I knew it! I win! For the record, Bells, you aren't so bad yourself." With that, he drew me into another hug, and I took advantage of the closeness to revel again his warmth. The woodsy scent I'd noticed this afternoon was only increased thanks to the bonfire, and the combination of the two brought a smile to my face.

"Thanks, Jake. I'd better get going before Charlie starts to worry. Not that we've really gotten far enough to talk curfew or anything, but I don't think Chief Swan would appreciate his daughter staying out too late on her first week in town."

"No problem. I'll see you soon, kay? Christmas, if not before!"

"Sure, sure," I yelled back over the truck's engine, laughing at the natural way Jake's phrase rolled off of my tongue.

That night I fell asleep quickly and into dreams of sunshine and grassy fields and sandy beaches. The common thread in every dream was the warmth on my skin and the presence of the boy who was quickly turning into my own personal sun in this land of clouds.


	3. Chapter 3

Over the next several days, I spent most of my time with Jake. We made a few junk yard runs to look for car parts, finished our Christmas shopping, and spent countless hours goofing off at both of our houses. It was impossible to miss Charlie's silent approval at the budding friendship. He was even happy to feed the always hungry Jake anytime he came over, though I always did the cooking.

Christmas morning, snowflakes were softly falling as I sat up in bed and remembered my plans for the day. Charlie and I agreed to wait and exchange gifts until after dinner at Billy's. Something about the prospect of a Christmas with snow, my first that I can remember, was oddly exhilarating. For once, I wasn't upset about the cold or the wet.

The warm steam of the shower quickly fogged the mirrors in the bathroom, as well as my senses, as I dazedly prepared for the day. I quickly dressed to prevent the cold from taking over and then made work of drying my hopeless hair into submission. After some struggle, it occurred to me that it shouldn't matter. Jake and Billy are family, and family won't care if my hair is pin straight on a day like today. But that wasn't the problem.

I did care. I wanted to look as special as I felt on this holiday. Suddenly, the routine worn jeans and broken in cotton shirt seemed too simple, too routine for Christmas. The longer I dug through my closet, the more hopeless I felt. Nothing seemed right. The best I could do was a deep green sweater and some newer looking pants. As I glanced over the new ensemble, it just didn't seem enough. Not for Christmas. I resolved to change that for the next special occasion, and decided that at some point I'd need to go to Olympia or Seattle for something nicer. Thanks to Billy and Jake, I had more funds than I'd planned on, even if it was meant for college. I smiled, now content at the prospect of a solo shopping expedition and headed down stairs to start the day.

Though Billy and Jake invited us for dinner, I knew there was no way they'd be able to prepare a good Christmas dinner themselves, so at Charlie's recommendation I volunteered to help with the cooking. We left for La Push early so I could start the ham, hoping it would mean we would eat by late afternoon. Before the cruiser even came to a stop, Jake's silly grin appeared in the front window, and the front door swung open an instant later.

"Merry Christmas, Bella!" was the only warning I heard before Jake crashed into me, pulling me into his strong embrace.

"Jeez, Jake, you are going to squish me one day! You keep getting stronger," I observed, glowing from his attention.

"Yeah Jake, it sure looks like it. That sweater barely fits now! Didn't you just get new winter clothes a month or so ago?" Charlie queried.

"Yup," he said proudly, popping the p. "Dad says I must be hitting my growth spurt. Again. I guess I'm just too fine a specimen to stay one size for too long!" he declared with a cocky grin.

"Alright, Jake, enough bragging, let them inside so Bella can start cooking," Billy called from the door.

"Well, only if food is involved. I feel like I haven't eaten in weeks!" With laughs all around, we moved inside.

Billy and Charlie settled in to watch the game, claiming they trusted my cooking expertise enough to leave me in peace to work. Jake kept me company, chattering endlessly about what was going on with the guys. I mostly listened, smiling and throwing in a side comment or two between exchanging dishes from the oven. Talking with Jake was so easy, more so than even talking with Renee.

Soon enough, dinner was done and Jake and I set the table.

"Wow, Bells. This all looks great!" Dad complimented.

"I just don't know why you only cooked for two. You knew Charlie and I would be joining you," Billy joked, "and it looks like my son's going to eat enough for all of us tonight."

"What? I said I was hungry! Don't worry, I'll leave some for you guys," Jake said before shoving a fork full of potatoes in his mouth and shooting a tight-cheeked grin my way.

We fell into normal conversation, though Jake had a hard time contributing between mouthfuls of ham and relish. For the first time in a long time, it felt like a real family Christmas. Renee's poor attempts at cooking and Phil's busy schedule the last couple of years meant that we didn't get to sit down to a meal very often. Funny, how so many years of that lead me to believe that this was only something from stories.

After dinner Jake cleared the dishes while Charlie and Billy caught the last bit of the game and I made hot chocolate for everyone. We settled in around the tree to open presents, only to be joined last minute by Sam and Emily, bearing smiles and cookies. Sam excused himself to talk with Jake in the kitchen, and I caught Billy shooting him a stern, yet weary glance as Emily and I sat down to catch up before we started opening gifts.

"So when will you start school in Forks?" she asked.

"Start of the new term is the first Monday after the new year. I can't believe how soon it is, but at the same time it seems like I've been here so much longer than I really have. Just a little over a week, but it feels like months! In a good way," I added, thinking of how quickly I'd grown fond of Jake and Billy, and everyone in La Push. Again, the familiar heat of blush crept up on to my cheeks and I couldn't help but smile at the thought.

"It does seem like you've been here longer than that. You'll have to come visit even though school's in session. I don't think Jake there will be able to handle all the guys himself, now that he's so used to having you around," Emily added with a knowing look.

"Okay its present time!" a very excited Jake declared upon entering the tiny family room.

A cheer from the rest of us indicated agreement, and the gift-opening began. Despite my protests about gifts, Charlie got me a certificate to buy books at a store in Port Angeles. He liked the new tackle box I bought him, and thanked me with a glistening tear in the corner of his crinkley smile.

Jacob received new sweaters from Billy, who smirked at his son's disappointment. Jake admitted a few days ago he was hoping for more car parts. Sam and Emily gave Charlie and I a cookbook with recipes for fish, knowing that between the two of us it would get a lot of use. After good hour of laughing and present opening, it seemed time for everyone to go their separate ways.

"Hey Bella, can you come here for a sec before you leave?" Jake called as I stretched from my seat on the couch next to Emily.

"Sure, sure," I replied with a half smile, and followed him down the hallway to the back of the house. We stopped outside a closed door and he took my hand to lead me in. "Jake! You are burning up! Are you okay? I mean, I know you're hot, but this is the warmest you've been!" I cried in surprise, then blushed at the double meaning of my words.

He just grinned and replied "What can I say, I'm just a warm kind of guy. Anyway, I wanted to give you your gift in private." He reached into the tiny closet and pulled out a small, woven bag. The intricate design of reds and oranges and browns reminded me of Jake's warmth, in his eyes, on his hands.

"Jake it's really pretty! I love the colors, it looks so much like home. Like the desert." Images of cacti and the sun setting on the rusty mountains stormed my mind and my heart ached a little for the arid Phoenix landscape.

"I thought you might. I know you aren't quite used to all this green and cold and cloudy, so I wanted you to have a piece of something from home. But that's not actually the gift, Bella. Open it," he gently commanded.

I tugged at the strings, loosening the opening on the bag and tipping it over. A small silver pile slid from the bag into my hand. Jake quickly scooped up the pile and held my wrist.

"It's a bracelet," Jake said softly as he fastened the chain to my wrist. "I know you don't like jewelry, but I hoped it would be simple enough that you didn't mind, but it would remind you of me," he finished, a little embarrassed.

"Oh Jake, it's great, thank you. That's really thoughtful." I spun the chain around my wrist, admiring its delicate design.

"Bells, it's time go to!" Charlie's voice drifted down the hallway. I smiled at Jake, and made for the doorway to meet Charlie.

"Wait!" he called, catching my wrist at the door. Then, grinning sheepishly, he glanced up, then back down at me. "Um, Bella. Mistletoe."

The erratic thumping in my heart and ears quickly became the only thing I could hear. I felt the warmth in my cheeks, and looked up to confirm the holiday foliage hanging from his doorway. Before I could react, his warm hands came down on my shoulders and slid swiftly to my hands, pulling me towards him, heat radiating from the closeness of his body. Without hesitation, his lips came down on mine, warm and soft.

"Bella! Let's go! You can see Jake tomorrow!" I pulled away, unsure of how to react.

With a quick glance at Jake, who was grinning from ear to ear, and a silent wave goodbye, I met Charlie at the front door and we left into the cool Christmas night.

Sleep didn't come easily that night. There was still a cool tingle on my lips where Jake's warm ones had been. As I replayed that moment over and over in my head, I couldn't decide how I felt about Jake's surprise advances. While he and Billy are the closest to family I've felt, aside from Charlie and Renee, I wasn't sure if my deepened feelings for him were forking down the romance road or not. As sleep finally took over my consciousness, I smiled, knowing for now it didn't matter. Jake would never ask me to make a choice.

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A couple of days later, the whole La Push gang gathered again on the beach for a bonfire and dinner. I drove down with Jake, who made no mention of the mistletoe incident on Christmas. As I'd hoped, nothing between Jake and I changed. He held my hand as he guided me down the walk to the beach and let me huddle under his arm as the night grew cooler. Quil and Embry, comical as always, entertained us while we roasted marshmallows by acting out old tribal legends. Sam was the only one who didn't seem quite entertained by their antics, instead carefully eyeing Jake, again like he was looking for something that wasn't quite there. I was too busy watching Sam to hear what caused his reaction, but the sudden change in his demeanor drew my attention back to the two boys.

"Quil, Embry, enough. I think it's time to change subjects," Sam called with a cold authority I'd never before seen in him.

"Jeez Sam, lighten up! It's just a story. But if you realllly don't want us to talk about it, we can always just tease Embry, right Jake?" Quil seemed un-phased by Sam's command, and Jake just laughed along, easily moving to the new line of conversation. I was still curious.

"Hey Jake, you want to take a walk before I head home?" Part of me felt like I was taking advantage of the situation. I knew he wouldn't say no.

"Oooooohhh Jake and Bella on a walk in the dark!!" Quil teased from the other side of the fire.

Jake stood smiling and offered me his hand. "Are you sure you don't want to grab a jacket before we go? It's probably colder by the water," I reminded him.

"No, 's okay. I'm actually quite toasty," he claimed, and pulled me into him for a hug for proof. In only a long sleeved shirt, he was in fact, quite warm for the December evening. We walked towards the water, making our way on the sandy ridge about 50 feet above the break in the waves. He squeezed my hand and asked "So what'dya wanna talk about? Or were you just trying to get me alone?" I giggled nervously, and decided to ease into the conversation gently.

"So Quil and Embry were pretty funny. I didn't realize there were so many old legends."

"Yeah, well you know, when you look as good as us Quileute boys, you've gotta have lots of stories to impress the ladies with, "he teased with a wink.

"Well I guess that makes sense," I replied, grinning, and continued, "but I had a hard time focusing on the stories with your arm around me. What was that last one Quil and Embry were telling before Sam cut them off." Blushing at the thought of what I was about to do, I looked down at the sand, then up through my lashes, batting my eyes like I'd seen girls do in Phoenix to get boys' attention.

Jake just looked at me, jaw slackened and cloudy-eyed for a second. He shook his head back and forth, seeming to clear his head and said, "Oh, that one. Yeah, it's kind of complicated. And a little scary. Are you sure you want to know? I wouldn't want to keep you up all night thinking about me... err me telling you this story, that is," he was blushing now.

Uncertain where this sudden confidence came from, I stopped and turned to face him. Our faces were much closer together than I expected, and I used it to my advantage. Something about Sam just wasn't right, and I needed to know what he didn't want Quil and Embry to say. Repeating the silly eyelash move, I replied, "I think I can handle it, Jake."

For a moment, he fell into the same hazy state from a moment before. After a gentle shake of the arm, we started walking again and he began.

"Well okay, if you insist, and you have to promise you won't hold it against me if you have bad dreams…"

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As I drove back to Forks, I replayed the legends of the wolves in my head. What was with Sam's reaction? The story seemed harmless enough, just a way to explain how the tribe came to be. Every culture has them, so why didn't Sam want Embry and Quil to act that particular story out?

After saying a quick goodnight to Charlie, I jumped in the shower, letting the hot water warm my cheeks from the cold outside. As the heat took over, I thought about the Cold Ones from the legend. It struck me suddenly that compared to Jake I probably looked like one, with the pale, nearly translucent skin. I knew from long nights studying that it wouldn't be hard to forge the purple circles from sleepless nights under my eyes, though my brown ones could never be confused for red, nor for the bronze eyes supposedly belonging to those unusual vampires from the legend. Suddenly, I laughed at the thought of Jake as a giant wolf, tongue lolling around with a silly grin. What a silly superstitious tale. Jake would make a terrible protector; he was too silly, too relaxed, too boyish for that much responsibility, even if his physique was more man than his age suggested.

I stepped out, toweled off and crawled into my favorite sweat pants and a t-shirt, finally ready for bed. Smiling at another unexpected evening with my new friends, I let sleep take me over.

The lush, green foliage surrounded me, cloudy light sneaking through the trees to light the otherwise dark woods. My attention flew to the rustling of leaves in the distance. My breath caught, unsure of what could be making the noises in the leaves. Without breaking rhythm, the rustling continued to move towards me, yet I couldn't make out footsteps. A gentle glow broke through the branches, and I barely registered a human form moving towards me. The way it moved, I could tell it was a man, but all I could see was the outline of his figure with a halo of light surrounding it. Then I saw them, the strangest, honey colored eyes. Something inside me recognized Jake's description of the Cold Ones, and my heartbeat quickened in uncertainty.

Suddenly, the figure crouched down and turned into the woods in front of me. I gasped in surprise as a growl broke out from the trees, and a flash of deep brown raced towards the haloed figure, who glanced my way with the strange, light eyes for just an instant before leading the furry blur away from me and further into the woods. An intense jolt of concern ripped through my torso, and instinct drove my legs after the two, brushing branches past me as quickly as possible. I didn't know why, but I had to stop whatever was going on. Fast as I ran, I couldn't see them anywhere. All I could hear was growling erupting through the brush, and loud, thunderous clashes, like boulders being smashed together.

I sat bold upright in my bed, confused, and unexpectedly cold. Looking around, I realized I was still in my room, so the forest scene must have been a dream. I wiped the sweat from my forehead and attempted to detangle my legs from my sheets and calm the erratic beating of my heart.

It was just a dream. Just a dream caused by Jake's silly stories. Of course, I should have known better than to think about it before bed. I settled back into the covers and readjusted my pillow. Curling into my side, I tried to sleep again but couldn't shake the anxiety. I wanted to see the glowing figure, but feared the brown blur from my dream would destroy it before I had the chance. Taking a deep breath, I remembered what Jake said. The wolves were protectors, they wouldn't hurt an innocent. At least, that's what I hoped.


	4. Chapter 4

I woke the next morning still uncertain. What did the dream mean? Why did I have such a hard time figuring out my anxiety? The mysteries of the evening before were equally puzzling. I still had no real explanation for Sam's strange behavior not only at the bonfire, but the last few days. Needing some time and space to figure things out, I opted for a book over Jake's company. Though the echo of his tingling lips still lingered on mine, I was confused, and the last thing I needed was to complicate the situation.

The well worn copies of my favorite books sat neatly in a row on the shelf near my desk. I picked one at random, and began my escape into the romantic period piece. Hours must have flown by without my notice, because soon enough I heard the cruiser pull into the driveway. I stumbled near my door as I hurried downstairs to start cooking dinner.

"Bells? You here?"

"Sure am Dad, does chicken sound okay for dinner?"

"Anything sounds great. I'm beat. I think I'm just going to check on the game, okay?"

He removed his holster and jacket, leaving them on the peg by the door, and moved to the couch in the living room. I heard the familiar buzz of the television coming to life. I seasoned the chicken and threw it in the oven, then went to the refrigerator to see what else I could make. As I poured myself a glass of water, I realized I hadn't heard from Jake at all today. Maybe he found something to do after all in my absence.

Twenty minutes later, I served dinner and Charlie and I enjoyed the meal in a companionable silence. I liked that Charlie didn't feel the need to force a conversation, preferring to keep to himself. He was almost the opposite of Jake, except nothing about Jake was ever forced, always easy and natural.

"So Bells, school starts in a few days. Do you have everything ready?"

"Um, sure, Dad. I haven't really thought about it I guess. It's been pretty busy around here." I really had not put much thought to school, but his sudden reminder made my stomach tighten as the familiar nervousness returned. While re-meeting the Blacks and the introduction to everyone at La Push had been pretty smooth, I didn't think the same would happen at school. Everyone probably knew to expect Chief Swan's only daughter, finally returned to town after years of hiding in the desert with her flakey mother. The Quileutes were farther removed from local gossip, having a first-hand source in Charlie always available to them.

"Well, I have time off this weekend. I was planning to go watch the game at the Clearwater's with Billy, but if you wanted I could change my plans and we could do something together before classes start on Monday?"

"No, that's okay, you should go watch the game. I'll probably just be doing laundry and getting ready, you know, for school and stuff." The last thing I wanted was Charlie trying to be fatherly as I braced for the first day at tiny Forks High.

"Okay, if you're sure. Hey dinner was great, Bells. Thanks. I'm gonna go catch the end of the game."

With that he left the kitchen, and I cleared the table and started the dishes. After returning the cleaned plates and silverware to their places in the cupboard, I headed upstairs for the night to resume reading.

"Goodnight, Dad. I'm going to read and then head to bed."

"Night, Bells" he called from the couch.

Curled up again in my bed, I continued turning the pages as the plot deepened, but I wasn't really reading. My mind was in a story far away from the English romance in my lap. I spread out flat on my back and let the book fall next to me on the bed. Staring at the patterns in my ceiling, I mused over my feelings for Jake, which seemed to be bordering on more than just friends. We certainly acted like close friends, despite the duration of the friendship, but aside from my body's reaction to him, I wasn't sure if I felt anything more. He was caring, funny, and easy to be with. His smile lit up the space around him, contagious enough to drag me out of the ever-present gloom when I arrived to cloudy Washington. But was there anything beyond that?

Again that night I found myself in the forest, repeating the same dream from the night before. When the glowing figure broke through the trees, I was drawn to him, my feet moving of their own accord towards him. The golden-brown eyes locked with mine, tinged with a sadness deeper than I'd ever seen, but their attention was quickly drawn again by the growling from the trees. This time, the man crouched in front of me, as if protecting me from the noise in the shadows. Slowly, the invisible beast stalked forward with a menacing growl. As it emerged from the trees, I finally saw the figure of the wolf. Its reddish brown fur standing on end, clearly in attack mode, yet the deep, brown eyes betrayed the beastly form and seemed almost human. And so familiar… Even in their anger and determination, it was like I knew them all too well.

As suddenly as they appeared before me, both took off into the night with a fit of growls and snarls, clearly intending to take their fight far away from me. I chased after them again trying to find out why they were fighting. Neither one was doing me harm, yet they both seemed to be trying to protect me from the other. I kept running, the ferocious roaring getting closer as I moved. I was almost scared to catch up, fearing what I might find, yet not entirely sure what I feared.

I came out of the woods into a clearing, struggling to catch my breath when I saw them. In the moonlight, the wolf and the man, now easily visible, were fighting. As they lunged at one another, I couldn't help but let out a scream.

"NO!"

I awoke with a start, again sweaty and tangled in my sheets, and realized it was just a dream. After a few minutes my breathing slowed and my heart rate returned to normal. Thankfully, Charlie was too deep into sleep to hear me scream. As the panic subsided, I tried to rationalize what happened, but I couldn't.

Jake's silly stories made no sense, and my dreamy manifestations were no better. If the Cold Ones that supposedly came to Forks and turned the Quileutes into wolves were harmless to people, then the wolf in my dream was attacking for no reason. And if vampires had undeniable lust for blood, it made no sense for one to defend me from a wolf. It seemed my unconscious could not reconcile the contradictory facts.

At that minute I wished I'd left it all alone. Unable to get the situation off of my mind, I decided to see if Renee responded to my email from the week before. I stared at the clock near my bed, watching the neon red minutes change as the computer started. When it finally loaded, I opened my inbox to find several more messages from Renee. I probably should have called her on Christmas. From her emails, it sounded like she was pretty well distracted in Florida with Phil and only a little bit upset that I didn't bother to contact her. I decided to write her a decent response so that she knew I hadn't forgotten about her while I was tucked away in my little world up here on the other side of the country.

_Mom,_

_I'm sorry I didn't call you on Christmas! The day started pretty early and Charlie and I spent most of it at La Push with the Blacks. You remember Billy, right? Well his son, Jake, and I have been spending a lot of time together with his other friends down at the reservation. I made dinner for the four of us—no surprise—and Sam and Emily, two of Billy and Jake's friends, came to visit for dessert. Dad got me a gift certificate for a bookstore in a town nearby, so I might try to visit before school starts and find a couple of new books to read. Dad liked his tackle box, but that was easy enough to pick for him._

_I'm glad to hear you are happy in Florida. I miss the sun, though the cold isn't as bad as I thought it would be. Jake is like my own human blanket. For some reason that kid is always overheated. I've been spending some time at First Beach with the other kids from La Push It's quite beautiful, as you may remember, but I don't know that anything could really compare to a Florida beach, especially considering it's cold and rainy here. How is Phil? Did the two of you have a good Christmas?_

_School starts Monday, so I might have more updates for you then. I love you Mom. Tell Phil I said hi._

_Love,_

_Bella_

Satisfied that the message would tide Renee over for a few more days, I climbed back into bed and let the exhaustion from the previous attempt at sleep take me over.

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I spent the next couple of days cleaning and doing laundry, preparing myself for the inevitable start of the semester. Jake and Billy came over for an uneventful dinner on Friday night, but things turned pretty quickly.

We'd spent most of the evening goofing around in the kitchen while Billy and Charlie watched TV, Billy calling Jake to the living room every once in a while to refill drinks. I was getting more comfortable with his increasingly obvious affections, even feeling strangely brave enough to seek out physical contact on my own. Something inside seemed to drive me towards him, encourage him to smile back at me. While I was cleaning up after dinner, he came behind me to put away some dishes. The heat on my back made my muscles twinge, and I felt a tingle in my in my abdomen that I couldn't quite place. Without thinking, I turned quickly to face him, leaning back on the counter and dragging his face down to mine. Our lips met for the second time and he gasped, stunned initially, as I was, by the boldness of my actions. He barely had time to react when I realized what I'd just done, and the embarrassment settled in.

Charlie called from the living room at that instant, asking if we needed help with the cleanup and effectively diffusing the situation. Jacob and I looked at each other sheepishly, and immediately made our way out into the living room to join our fathers.

Not ten minutes later, it started.

"Bells are you trying to poison me to get me back for the mistletoe thing? What did you feed me?" he joked lamely, as Charlie pushed his dad to the cruiser so he could drive them back. His smile was half-hearted and he looked like he was struggling to keep his stomach where it belonged.

"Not all Jake, but feel better okay? I guess New Years' is probably on hold for now." Jake and I decided to hang out on New Year's Eve earlier in the day, agreeing to keep the night low key with school starting for both of us on the second, but he looked in no position to be making plans for the next night. I handed him a paper bag just in case. When our hands made contact, it nearly burned.

"Jake you are on fire! Let me feel your forehead." Sure enough, his face was as warm as his hands. "Wow you don't look so good, Jake. I don't think this has anything to do with my cooking. The rest of us are just fine!"

"Let's hurry you home, Jake. You don't want to be here when…. Well if you get sick," Billy said with more force than normal, and I noted how his eyes shifted as he corrected himself I heard him mumble something about "shouldn't have come when the signs started", and I eyed the older man suspiciously. Something didn't seem quite right.

Charlie returned home by the time I finished the dishes. "Bells he looks awful. Sweaty and shaking, I told Billy to get him to the doctor pretty quick, but Billy seemed to think he could handle it and shooed me out of there pretty fast."

"It happened so fast. He seemed fine until right after dinner. It's almost like Billy saw it coming the whole time we were sitting there—he was so quick to notice the change and leave." My forehead crinkled with worry for my friend's health, and wondered if the constant refills Billy requested were a guise. "I guess I'll call him tomorrow and see if he's feeling okay. Maybe I can bring by some soup or something."

"That's a great idea, Bells, I'm sure he'll really appreciate it."

Sleep came easily that night. The restlessness of the last few evenings paired with the stress of the day left me without dreams, and before I knew it, the light of early morning peeked through the curtains in my window. I woke quickly, remembering Jake's episode the night before and called over.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Billy. It's Bella. I was wondering if I could talk with Jake?"

"Bella. Nice of you to call. He's…. not able to take the phone right now… you know. I'll tell him you called."

Click.

Billy's brevity caught me off guard. I didn't know why, but something about that conversation just didn't feel right. Deciding to let it go, I plopped down on my bed to finish the book from days earlier, knowing I might not get a chance for leisure reading for a while come Monday.


End file.
